Saturday, February 26, 2011
Nurses are Bitches
I don't think many people know how mean nurses can be to each other and to students. It's been a few weeks since I've come across one, but there are some really angry nurses out there. If you don't believe me, look around for yourself, there are entire books dedicated to the topic. As students, we see a lot of this (I'm hoping more of it than we will as RN's).
I had a classmate get a pen thrown at her by an angry nurse on our OB rotation and I've spent the day with plenty who would not even introduce themselves to me. It's been FUN! Whenever I come across these people, I can't help but think, "You weren't BORN a nurse! What is your problem?" We've talked about it in class and our instructors know the story. "Don't they remember being students??" we cry, and their reply is always, "No, they don't."
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I have been a student, an instructor and a staff RN so I have been on all sides of this issue. I think the one to blame (most of the time) is the instructor. I HATE when students come on the unit and sit at the desk taking all the chairs where I need to work, have all their things covering every inch of the place I have for a break and to eat dinner, and are not prepared IN ANY WAY for the clinical setting.
ReplyDeleteWhen I was an instructor my students had boundaries as to where they could go so they would not take the staff's places to sit and work. My students were not allowed to mill around the station. They were to get their chart information the evening before clinical.
In addition, I did not palm my students off on staff. Sometimes as a staff nurse, an instructor asks me to take on 2 or 3 students to just "pass the time" till it gets busier. When I ask those students about the patients or try to have them do something they can NEVER do it. Why is a student in newborn nursery who doesn't know the basic anatomy of a newborn, any of the reflexes or how to do a Ballard? These were check-offs that had to be done in the lab before a student got to clinical in my day as an instructor.
This, fellow nurse, is my issue with students in the clinical setting! Thanks for asking,
Dawn
You lack patience. Students need nurturing! Many are simply of afraid of performing in the real-world setting and need guidance during their first try. Please be more patient. You were once a student too. You must remember that students are the future. What will happen to the nursing profession without properly nurtured students?
DeleteNursing is about compassion and empathy. Please be more
understanding of students and help them: Help them become the nurse you always wished to be.
I'm sorry, but who the hell made you God of all things in the nurses station. Student's will sit down where there's an available seat, and if it happens to be 'yours' well too bad - get another one. Geez, this petty sh*t is what makes being a new nurse hell. Again, as Anon says, new nurses have the knowledge but not the experience, and how the hell are they supposed to get that experience, when they're chewed up for every mistake they make. Sorry, but I'm sick of those burned out old hag nurses whom can't understand that a new nurse doesn't know the unspoken and spoken rules of the ward, and needs time to learn them.
DeleteYou sound like a real sweetheart, and quite frankly, YOU sound like the problem. Thank GOD I haven't had a preceptor like you.
DeleteThanks for you post, Dawn! It's a shame you've had such bad experiences with students. Similar to you, my instructors set very strict rules for us during clinicals. We were not allowed to bring any belongings with us other than our lunches (no bags, jackets, etc.) so as to not clutter up the break room, and were prohibited from congregating around the nursing station or leaving papers or clipboards lying around. We were to be doing something or helping someone (whether it be a nurse, tech, or any other staff member...) at all times. Despite this, many of the nurses we encountered were very unfriendly.
ReplyDeleteI am a new nurse and have yet to work with students myself, but I would think it would be great to have an extra set of hands around. That being said, if the instructor is not diligent about setting rules for the clinical setting, I can see how having a bunch of extra bodies milling about aimlessly would be frustrating!
all I can say is Lord of the Flies
ReplyDeleteI'm a second career newly graduated nurse nearing 40 and a male. It's apparent to me that the culture of nurses is to "eat their young". Many of the RN's I come in touch with are just miserable. It's frustrating to me since the work that they do can be so rewarding. Yes, they are overworked and have to much to do but I'm not sure that's reason enough to be miserable. I wish these people would just leave the profession. I refuse to become this type of nurse, if I see that happening I'll find a third career!
ReplyDeleteyou might as well jump out now
DeleteYou have the right attitude! Florence Nightingale would be
Deleteproud.
I've been a nurse for 23 years. I've been on the student nurse side 3 times now (associates, bachelors, and now masters). I work full-time as a staff RN in a hospital. I also help precept students and new grads when they are in my department.
ReplyDeleteThe conflicts that I have had thus far have been with "God-like" professors in college, mostly in my associates degree program. I never encountered any of those kind in my RN-to-BSN program. Now that I've been in graduate school for the past 3 years, I've had 2 or 3 professors that were determined I wasn't going to make an A, or that would belittle me as much as possible throughout the semester. Those are the only classes that I have not made an A in, too. Most professors in my grad school, though, treat me almost like a peer.
Regarding actually working as a RN: The first 11 years out of school were great. I worked in several areas: medical, surgical, home health, hospice, management, marketing, etc... There never seemed to be any bitterness or back stabbing until I inherited a new boss in a home care agency. She rode me like a bull rider for everything, even though I was successfully (very successfully) doing my job as a manager. I lasted a few years there, anyway. I then chose to go to work in acute care, and it's been pretty much hell ever since. Even the nurses that I work with every day and have for many years gossip about each other constantly and behave very selfishly in their roles. Each one is very self-serving. 2 of them are so lazy they won't even walk down the hall to the patient's room most of the time. They ask the patients to come to them (seriously). There is constant contention between the ones who do not work hard and the rest of us who do. It's a lazy contest when you get those nurses in the mix. The boss will not do anything about it (even though she has known and admitted the problem for more than a decade) because she will only confront the ones she can bully. She doesn't seem to know how to be assertive without being aggressive. She either allows certain people to get away with anything or writes you up for stupid stuff like being a minute late or for something that the pampered, lazy nurses told her that isn't true to save their own behinds. She has no clue how to be an effective leader. I am hoping upon my next career move that the dog-eat-dog environment and poor attitudes of my coworkers will be gone. It's really pitiful that nurses choose to be this way and we generally have to tolerate it.
I can't say that I have experienced a lot of obvious "meanness" out of any of the nurses I've worked with except 1. The behind-the-back, self-serving gossip and back stabbing are what I see mostly.
I think it's just working with women. I recently was treated in the ER and two nurses really were mean!
DeleteI was in severe pain and couldn't answer all questions and she complained I was rude. The other nurses were great. But it seems that the profession is getting mean. Stay out of it then. Lots of professions are understaffed and stressful yet much more underpaid then nurses. The night I was in the ER I was the only patient in an ER bay! I like the male nurses coming into the profession. My experience has been great with them.
there's a common thread among the miserable wentches: they're generally older, unattractive, and bitter individuals.
ReplyDeleteI find most clinical instructors are overweight, have not been on an actual floor for decades and don't want their own license damaged from a student... They come to the floor hours in advance to hand pick the pt's for the students,, No non-compliance No hard to please, No difficult drugs to give and etc... then the students get out in the real world and are like WHAAAAAT... My personal experience c students has not been great.. THey come in have to have coffee, are on their cell phones, take the charts out of my hand, my paperwork(my brain) from me.....When I tell them I have a skill they come and do, Like a foley cath removal.... I've already done one of those... Yeah does not set very well with me
ReplyDeleteI don't know why people make excuses for mean nurses. It's not professional and in any other industry throwing a fit or copping an attitude is not tolerated. You train, you mentor and if you have a bad day, you leave that crap at home. If your having work issues then you address it like an adult and not a ten year old. It is a disgrace to me seeing nurses have an attitude and ego with the students. If you don't want them around then pass them off to someone else. Also from my experience they students are normally willing and eager to learn ... until a mean nurse squashes any passion and enthusiasm out of the students.
ReplyDeleteI completely agree. I think that students make nurses feel inferior because many older nurses have forgotten and are not current with contemporary medical information. Students may hurt and older nurse's ego. Students do not mean to this; they are eager to learn, and they just want to share and compare their information with others, especially those who are experienced. Please, nurses, you must be attentive and understanding with students. This is what will change the future of nursing. Nurses nurture, not only their patients, but their future.
DeleteI was assigned to 2 patients on a subacute unit before I graduated. I was one of the most diligent, outgoing students and was ECSTATIC at the opportunity to practice my new skills. I had several nurses see that excitement and throw every procedure they could at me (not just for my patients, for the whole floor)- I loved it, and I called one "my angel".
ReplyDeleteThe last month of clinical, I had a nurse who wore flowery/Hawaiian scrubs - I thought she'd be perky, like me. HELL NO. The first thing she did was complain about her "lazy" co-workers, curse and talk behind their backs, and told me that my LVN program had "gone down-hill" (all within the first hour). I told her I hoped I could impress her, and she apologized for her behavior by the end of the day.
DON'T BE THAT NURSE. She hated her job, she was just there for a paycheck and the only thing she taught me was how NOT to treat my co-workers and students. If you don't like your job or working with students, find a new job at a facility that doesn't have students... That energy is completely unhealthy and unproductive. Please pass your knowledge and love of nursing on to the next generation, don't try to scare them away.
I am on my second career and only have 2 classes left in my ARN school. I am a male student and my experience so far has been frustrating. The women I have encountered in this field are mean spirited, ego driven, condescending, and downright nasty people. I have a BS in Business Admin and have run large revenue business ($10+ million/year). I have had over 40 employees that I managed and even had 3 assistants to help me. I know what it takes to motivate people and none of the nurses I have encountered have any clue about motivation. I chose nursing because I wanted to get clinical experience so I could move on to physician assistant. However, after some of my clinical experience, I have chosen to get my masters in healthcare administration. The only way I make it through my classes, lab, clinical and pretty much any interaction with these nasty women is the knowledge that one day I will be their boss. Another note, it is evident that women write the questions for nursing tests because you have to figure out what the test writer is thinking to answer the question. Also, they include emotion in their questions. Black and white doesn’t exist, rather there seems to be shades of grey (not 50 shades of grey because that would be to much to ask these women to experience actual pleasure). No, I’m not already jaded, I’m just pissed at the f’n attitudes.
ReplyDeleteHaha heyeah buddy nursing IS 50 shades of gray... or should I say orange(as in which orange is the most orange). School just boils down to putting a bunch of Type A's in the same room w/o the real Top/Dom/HBIC/Queen bee squashing it before it starts. I'm a woman and can't stand the wannabe boss bitches including the catty gay hens. I hope you also understand the easy to understand sex is just as bad at writing tests as the "emotional" one. PS. Don't forget to include emotion as a part of the healing of your patient. Drugs aren't the only thing that heal. Maybe you'd be better suited as a doctor where things are a bit more cut and dry.
DeleteAnyone have suggestions on what type of units/setting that nurses seem to be less like the above comments? I have worked many setting, and I am finding the hospitals the absolute worst with behavior of nurses. I'd like to find an area that helps one another and works together.
ReplyDeleteI used to be in nursing school (got out because of Med Surg), but my suggestion would be mental health nursing. I loved all the MH practicums and teachers, as well as the people I worked with on the floor. It really sat well with me and if I'd have graduated, that's what I'd be doing. 3/3 MH instructors I had were good, and that's really saying something.
DeleteI was at the brink of passing my boards to officially become a BSN but my yr as a unit secretary/tech prior too the exam completely stumped my motivation to persue this debilitating career. I switched to I.T and have never been happier. More pay and without the bitchy attitudes. If nursing ia frustrating you, the, simply change careers. You live life to persue your own happines not anyone elses.
ReplyDeleteInteresting you would say that, as did the below poster. When I got out of nursing I decided to study I.T.......SO FRIENDLY, it was like a different world. Loved the attitudes and the teamwork in I.T.
DeleteMy view is from the bottom, no pun intended, as I am a CNA. What I see is most nurses are mean or crazy or both. If they don't have other nurses to pick on they pick on patients who cant defend themselves for some reason. That hate has to be used somehow. God help the most vulnerable. Charles Dickens was right.
ReplyDeleteI am a woman, and a former nursing student, and I too detest working with women! Hypocritical, I know, but the health care females are some of the worst people I've ever seen.
ReplyDeleteI came from the tech sector, and I'm a male in my 40s. I have been blown away by the level of bitichiness in nursing compared to IT . I do wonder why the worst burnouts don't just leave nursing and do us all a favour, they're useless - no caring, no compassion, bitter twisted burnouts. I've hardly ever had a problem with the male nurses, Not sure what it is about nursing which seems to attract these kind of women - but they need to rethink their chosen profession
ReplyDeleteI completely agree with you. It is the queen bee attitude that these older women have. It's because they had to go through so much trouble and unfairness being women working under male doctors and male higher ups over so many years, it took a lot of hard work for them to come up to that point; they don't like to see how easy it is now for the younger generation to do this. They want to make the lives of the new-comers hell. They are essentially bullies!
DeleteI made a 100% on my HESI A2 test, have a 4.0 GPA. I am a Biotechnologist and worked in research for a few years. I was always been interested in the medical field and decided to be a nurse. The school where I applied, I was the top applicant. However, I got so terribly harassed and bullied by the faculty, it is almost like they didn't want me; as if they wanted me to mess up so they could chew me out or kick me out of the program. The counselor was never there to answer questions, we weren't ever allowed to meet or see the Dean (as if she was the wizard of oz). They didn't even let us register for our classes, treated us like we were some stupid little children. They were all older, burnt-out looking hags. Just angry, never friendly, or smiling, I mean no one in the office ever smiled, they never showed any concerns fir their students' well-being. I know I am using extreme language like 'never'. But, that was my observation every single time! I was very sweet and kind to them and it didn't do any good.
I ultimately quit. It's a shame because I really wanted to be a nurse. Going to pursue my Ph.D instead. Research area is a much more friendly, less emotional and a more logically-minded field compared to nursing and being with bitchy nurses!
I have been out of nursing for 3 years. I was a very energetic caring nurse who went the extra mile for my patients and families who loved me. But the negative managers and BS really put a pall on it for me. When I went looking for references ( they wouldn't say anything negative) they wrote the bare minimum. One cow pretended she didn't know me that well. I was on her floor for 2 years. I had questioned something once and that was all it took for her to develop a dislike for me. Another nurse manager lied about a situation. She then did it to another manager which surprised that woman all to hell bec she had actually screwed me to this woman. I kept copies of my eval's but still their ugly attitudes made me want to reassess if it is worth it. I wrote a letter to the Dir. Of Nursing who responded with a glib sympathy letter. She had her own agenda with her position as she tried to do the Hospital CEO job but couldn't pull it off. Sure my salary was good but I earned it. Careful attentive patient monitoring saved many patients from complications and assisted a faster recovery.
ReplyDeleteI'm a paramedic student doing my hospital rotation portion of my course. I've never been disrespected so much and so consistently as I have been by nurses recently. We rotate to emergency departments throughout the county so I've encountered hundreds of nurses within the past weeks. It's the same at every hospital. It was very interesting to me in the beginning when I would introduce myself cheerfully, ask if I could help in any way, and in return hear a nasty response from a person I've never met in my life. I quickly learned to not expect anything different from these people. I may sound a little sour or overreacting about a few bad apples but the consistency of this happening is alarming. It makes me question who raised these people! Who taught them this behavior? Are they like this with family? It's truly a phenomenon.
ReplyDeleteI am a 44 year old male nurse who came into the profession later at 31. I've worked primarily in Intensive Care in the UK and I have to say I can't wait to leave the profession.
ReplyDeleteI have never met a group of who are so mean, rude, judgmental and downright nasty to each other.
What gives someone the right to bully, openly criticise in front of patients, relatives, other colleagues, and do it in the name of nursing. We all have different skills and strengths which someone with a bit of education in social behaviour would realise. I have witnessed bullying of doctors, fellow nurses to the point of them leaving, and students.
Due to family commitments I was forced to leave a full-time job a couple of years ago and work for an agency. This has really opened my eyes. I once thought this behaviour was confined to my own area but have come to realise this is a national phenomenon. The attitude shown to me by regular staff in some NHS settings has been horrific. The inability (or should I say unwillingness) to communicate with you is shocking. I believe ITU nurses may be worse, as many of them are unable to differentiate between their role of a nurse and the role of a doctor. You are following instructions by a medical team and told you should be doing it another way and ignore the doctors because 'I wouldn't do that'. I have been doing the job long enough to know when to question, and to do it professionally.
I'm very saddened that my fellow workers are forcing me out of the profession, but I know I am not the only one. A number of my friends have now embarked on brand new careers and have never looked back. I shall very soon be joining them.
I just hope that when the day comes that I need care, I am met with a smile by someone who not only cares for me but also for their colleagues and the human race in general.
I've an IMG medical student who had been thinking about going over to nursing because it is difficult to get residency in North American but has decided against it for many of the above comments. THe money is not worth the amount of pain that you have to go through and unfortunately, many in health care this is normal and ok.
ReplyDeleteOn one hand, I really respect the hard working nurses out there and I have met some great nurses who have taught me a lot in regards to clinical skills, medical practice and surviving healthcare. There are some awesome nurses out there and its important that fellow nurses recognize & support rather than belittle and encourage burnout.
Unfortunately, I have met many nurses , doctors, and other health care professionals who are not simple school yard bullies but I think you would classify them as "psychopaths"- people with little or no conscious who succeed in their professions by harming others which boosts their egos and makes them want to continue hurting people. Unfortunately, they think this is normal and it is no wonder that they are miserable. Even though it may be awesome to rule the unit by bullying everyone, eventually they affect the morale and quality of work in the unit and will not even understand why some people hate them so much.
Such people exist in every job but it seems quite of paradox that the most caring health care profession of nursing that such an environment exists. It really comes down to hierarchy. Senior doctors who have "issues" & certain nurses bully interns and med students. Frustrated med students have to suck it up and cannot wait to passively take it out as interns/residents on nurses and then nurses bully nursing/med students and the cycle repeats.
I think there also needs to be some serious training for doctors on being more humble in regards to life and treatment of others. I cannot believe how many people with egotistical god like personalities are graduating out of med school and think it is ok to treat other people like that. I have never seen so much strange behavior in medical school and residency. Pre med school, I worked in scientific research and did side jobs as an assistant in IT and the library for extra money. I never experienced such bullying. Med school was a shock. I felt that I was selling my soul to the devil whenever I had to get along with a bully nurse, intern etc. because I did not want to fail a rotation. I thought there was something wrong with me but glad to know that I am not only who thinks there are some people with serious mental issues working in health care who need to get their act together.
I hope all you nurses eat each other alive and get what you deserve. We understand there is a power dichotomy involved, we understand all that. We understand it's a dog-eat-dog world, but that doesn't change the fact that bullying, being condescending, there's gotta be someone who can run a business with empowering statements rather than diminishing -- it's too bad most doctors are full of ego, themselves, it's the wise businessmen that should be in power among all of these. The wise businessman understands and knows how to treat people respectfully and still gets what he wants. I think the profession of nursing just generally attracts these types of certain individuals, and their behaviors are not a direct result of the profession itself, however, that's not to say that the nature of the profession can add more fire to the fuel already present among their personalities. I say this -- everyone gets what they deserve, whether they like it or not, so no complaining, and let the nurses have their space and entitlement that they worked so hard to obtain.
ReplyDeleteBut, please, before you enter your home or go out to the real world, leave the stupid nursing baggage in the hospital and be a normal, stable person outside of work. That would only be fair.
DeleteClinical nurses are so much bitchier than psych nurses. I've never seen so much back stabbing and petty school girl bitching since, well... high school.
ReplyDeleteI too am a Paramedic student. One of the ER nurses apparently was poking and prodding a patient who was dehydrated. She was literally going in and out at least 3 times. I had asked to help her palpate for a vein (I used to work in phlebotomy). She agreed. I had no problem finding the vein and was asking her to feel it. She said no, so we tried the arm. Needless to say, I got reported. She stated that I snatched the tourniquet off. Be very careful of older nurses that smile alot. They are the most cunning, sneaky, sly, and dishonest people you will ever meet.
ReplyDeleteRad Tech, people. If you have problems getting in, try Respiratory. If you don't know why Nursing, as an industry, is imploding under the strain of over-regulation and the venomous environment created by the "old dogs". Nurses have killed nursing.
ReplyDeleteIf I knew what I know now, I would never have gone into Nursing. Should have Engineering or a field in computers!
ReplyDeleteI am taking classes in Data Analytics. So long nasty world of Nursing!
ReplyDeleteWOW! It's been almost five years since I wrote that post...I never thought it would hit so many nerves.
ReplyDeleteFive years later I consider myself to have turned out to be one of the nice ones haha... I'm still practicing as a nurse and I've really learned to not take things personal. I now understand the immense pressure we work under and how some of us take that pressure out on those around us. All in all I'm convinced it's usually nothing personal. And at this point, I wouldn't trade my profession for anything in the world :)
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ReplyDeleteI love nursing school except for 1 thing...the cruel and bully nurses in clinical rotation. I am second career, and so eager to learn but every time, I get shot down by a bully senior nurse, who can't remember what it was like to be in training. I am second year and now want to quit this cruel profession.
ReplyDeleteAs a bedside nurse this behavior is not determined by the age or sex of the nurse. To say it is ONLY older female nurses is sexist and ageism. Sure, I may count fewer men and fewer younger nurses, but this has more to do with total numbers. You all are just as responsible. It is also passive agressive to blame others for why you are not staying in nursing, you don't finish nursing school, or because your previous accomplishments do not allow you some sort of advantage you think you deserve. You can only control yourself and to pass on that responsibility based on someone else's behavior shows a lack of maturity.
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