Where'd you get those...?

There are some nurses on my floor that wear some seriously booty marking tight scrub pants.

Call me old fashioned but it seems a little weird and inappropriate. Not to mention that there is the potential you'll be kneeling into some shit, piss, vomit, blood, or worse in those sexy numbers... Patients probably like 'em though.

Baby's First Rectal Medication

I gave my first suppository the other day. The nurse I was working with said, "...patients ALWAYS refuse suppositories." But wouldn't you know it... when we asked the patient if they wanted it, the answer was a resounding "Yes!"

MS

My patient this week had multiple sclerosis. What a horrible disease! This was probably theeee nicest patient I've had so far which my experience all the sadder (not that I hope mean patients die or anything).

This week also brought my first experience with the condom catheter. I'm more used to dealing with cleaning the bums and genis of patients who are more or less out of it, but this one was totally lucid so it made it kind of embarrassing. Better get over it!!

 ...and my favorite quote of the week (from a fellow classmate in my clinical rotation), "I feel like a human bidet!"

Not Your Average Wink

"The anal wink or anocutaneous reflex is the reflexive contraction of the external anal sphincter upon stroking of the skin around the anus. The absence of this reflex indicates that there is an interruption of the reflex arc, which may be in the sensory afferent limb or the motor efferent limb. The synapse between the afferent and efferent limbs occurs in the lowest sacral segments of the spinal cord."

Booty Action

I got to see my very first hemorrhoid today and my instructor even made me poke it.

"Touch this," she said. 

  So I did. 

  The patient said, "Ouch." 

  And I said, "I'm sorry."

 

Later on I got to play interpreter for a Spanish speaking couple who were going home with their new baby. They weren't leaving though till I gave mom a shot of Depo Provera in the butt cheek. I'm pretty sure I overheard the father discussing employing the clamp that had been used to pinch off the end of his son's umbilical cord as a roach clip.